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Tips For Divorcing Parents

Illinois Lawyers Offering Tips For Helping Children During And After Divorce

Divorce is never easy on children. It often leaves them confused, believing their parents' breakup is their fault. They may be worried about having to move away or not seeing their other parent very frequently.

With more than 25 years of family law experience, the attorneys at Lucas Law in Barrington, Illinois, clearly understand the impact divorce has on a child's life. We believe there are many ways parents can help lessen the effect of divorce on their children.

Call 224-427-3500 for advice about protecting your children during divorce

For dependable advice about child-related concerns including child custody and child support, please contact Lucas Law

The 'Do's' Associated With Children And Divorce

  • Reassure your children they are loved and the divorce is not their fault. Many children assume that they are to blame for their parents' hostility.
  • Encourage your children to see your spouse frequently.
  • At every step during your divorce, remind yourself that your children's interests are paramount and act accordingly.
  • If possible, refrain from uprooting your children. Stability in their residence and school life helps buffer children from the trauma of their parents' divorce.
  • If you are the noncustodial parent, pay your child support. The loss of income facing many children of divorce puts them at a financial disadvantage that has a pervasive effect on the rest of their lives.

The 'Don'ts' Concerning Children And Divorce

  • Never criticize your spouse in front of your children. Children realize they are "part mom" and "part dad"— the criticism can batter a child's self-esteem. Children do not want to hear their parent is a bad person.
  • Do not use your children as messengers between you and your spouse.
  • Your children may be tempted to act as your caretaker. Resist the temptation to let them. Let your peers, adult family members or mental health professionals be your counselors and sounding boards. Let your children be children.
  • If you have a drinking or drug problem, get counseling right away.

Impairments inhibit your ability to reassure your children and give them the attention they need at this difficult time.

  • If you are the custodial parent and you are not receiving owed child support or alimony/spousal maintenance, do not tell your children. It feeds into the child's sense of abandonment and further erodes his or her stability.

To discuss other options for safeguarding your children and their best interests, contact us at 847-381-8700 or 224-427-3500 toll free.

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